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10 reasons why you thought “I’d never do THAT for a living”
- “It’s a career for immoral people.” Yep, that’s what you thought. Only people who lack standard ethics and morals would even consider entering into this horrible industry! But, that’s not true, at all. People who work in the adult entertainment field are honest, tax-paying citizens who are just as generous and good as anyone. They donate to worthy causes, help people when they are down and do the “right thing.” Of course, there are members of the adult entertainment community who are not so upstanding—just like in the general public. But, this industry is not automatically reserved for people who lack the ability to choose right from wrong or desire to be “bad.” Choosing to avoid this industry has nothing to do with morals or being “nice.” It may be associated with your behavior or how you present yourself, but not with being unethical or immoral.
- “I would never be THAT desperate for money!” Surprisingly, a career in the adult entertainment industry really isn’t about financial desperation. The first foray into the field might have a little to do with being in a money crunch. But, providers do not stay in this industry because they are desperate for cash. It’s true that your potential to earn some serious coin is higher in the adult entertainment field than in many career paths. And, it’s true that extra money is nice to have. But, people stay in this field for hundreds of other reasons other than being in need of a quick buck. Earning cash as an adult entertainment provider is hard. It takes a lot of work and isn’t for the faint hearted. People who are desperate for money sell belongings, steal or borrow money. It’s uncommon that entertainers are constantly in dire need of money and stay in their careers for that reason.
- “I don’t have the body or good looks for the job.” If you’re not a size 2 and lack a DD cup size, many women assume that they wouldn’t be eligible for adult entertainment provider careers. That’s utter BS! The world enjoys shapes and sizes of every kind. Beauty isn’t defined by a skinny waist, porcelain skin or goddess blonde hair. It’s got a much wider perception that includes various skin colors, body types and overall “types.” Many plus-sized entertainers earn considerably more income than more “mainstream” providers. This is probably one of the biggest objections about going into the industry, that is the most easily overcome. Clients and customers are always looking for their ideal woman—and, it’s not the same as the last guy’s. You’ve probably learned that clients like different things—which is just fine, because there is more than enough to go around!
- “I’m not sexually experienced.” Well, surprise, surprise! Many novices who enter the adult entertainment industry are fairly innocent. They don’t have vast sexual histories or much background in niches they get thrown into. Their inexperience is partly what makes them desirable from the beginning—and, then as they mature as an entertainer, they are sought after for their skills and talent they’ve developed. Many women feel like they don’t know what to do to be alluring to a client or customer. But, there isn’t a specific formula that has to be followed. While it sounds like a viable excuse for not considering the industry, it’s just that: an excuse. No accountant had experience being an accountant before diving into the career. No surgeon had ever operated on a patient prior to his first procedure. You learned that your inexperience wasn’t a burden or obstacle, just a part of who you were.
- “I wouldn’t be able to stand the kind of people I would have to associate with.” And, who are those people? They are just like everyone else. They have families. They have pets. They go to the grocery store and mop their own floors. The people in the industry are not dirty or depraved. They are not substandard or scumbags. (Of course, there may be the isolated incident where you run across others who lack decency—but, it’s no different than the percentage of them in the rest of the world.) Associating with the people in the industry means making friends, establishing career networking partnerships and developing business relationships. The settings may be a bit different than in “normal” jobs—but, the connections are nearly the same. You will bond with some people, clash with others and not really care one way or another about the rest.
- “I’m uncomfortable naked.” Everybody is, at first, especially in front of strangers. Even if you grew up in a house where nudity was pretty acceptable, it’s still difficult to transition from wearing clothes around everyone to being scantily clad in your workplace. It feel unnatural. But, in reality, it’s kind of like working at the beach or a swimming pool—except everyone else is fully dressed. Once you get past this little detail, it’s pretty easy. More uncomfortable than being naked is the shoes! Those high-heeled platform shoes that many clients and customers desire are extremely uncomfortable and difficult to walk in. Being naked is a cakewalk compared to the shoes! AND—the outfits you don for clients and customers aren’t always too easy to pull off, either. Crazy bras, g-string undies and other crazy atrocities will plague you to the extent that you WANT to be naked, instead!
- “I can’t dance.” So what? That’s what practice and lessons are for. As you probably found out at the start of your career, the way you knew to dance had nothing to do with how you perform for clients. If you’re an exotic dancer, your old version of the running man doesn’t hold a candle to what you learned to do on a pole. You learned through trial and error, watching and getting input about how to dance for your customers, based on your career choice. Escorts may use an entirely different bag of tricks when they dance for clients than exotic dancers do. Porn actresses will dance in segments, for the best camera angles. And, webcammers don’t have to know how to dance at all—unless that’s part of your shtick with clients. Dancing didn’t make or break you as an adult entertainer.
- “I’m too smart/educated to be an escort.” Bah! There are escorts with doctoral level degrees… along with those who barely got their G.E.Ds. Book intelligence or how many years you spent in school doesn’t matter squat when it comes to a career that requires you to know people. Being an adult services provider entails being able to see through a client/customer’s exterior to get an impression about his wants, needs, desires and intentions. It requires you to be able to see past lies and use your sixth sense to determine threats or timewasters. This career path requires you to be the kind of person others open up to and feel comfortable with. Those skills or abilities are not acquired in an ivy league school or with a high I.Q. You develop these traits as a person—and, apply them as such, too. Additionally, having some intelligence and upper level training in any field actually helps you in your adult services provider career. You need a lot of skills to perform well.
- “I don’t have any addictions that would force me to such a career.” Neither does the majority of other adult entertainment providers. Most successful webcammers aren’t strung out on dope when they do their big shows online. The most prosperous escorts aren’t drunk all the time with their clients. Having an addiction might drive you to do things you wouldn’t normally consider—but, it won’t propel you into a successful adult entertainment career. Sure, lots of people prostitute themselves out for a few bucks to get their next high. But, they aren’t exactly what you call career professionals. It’s a huge myth that adult entertainers are big druggies or alcoholics. To reach the top in any profession, you have to have your head straight and be focused. Addictions don’t allow you to do that—so, they don’t even factor into any kind of successful profession, in the adult industry or other.
- “I’m gay!” More money for you! Many women think that if they are lesbians, they will be unable to perform in the adult entertainment industry. What a myth this is! Being gay doesn’t stop anyone from being a provider of adult services. Exotic dancers can still dance for the opposite sex, despite their personal sexual preferences. Many escorts are bisexual and service both male and female clients. And, many scenarios are sought after where same-sex duos engage in intimacies with a client or for the pleasure of a client. And, keep in mind that the LBGT community needs adult entertainment, too. There is a niche for everyone. And, if you’re gay, you just need to embrace the opportunities available to you as they present themselves. (This may be different for everyone.)
Bonus reasons you thought you’d never make it in the adult services world:
- “I’m too shy!” Some of the shyest people in the world are extremely successful performers. Many movie stars, politicians and other celebrities report battling stage fright and bashfulness. Overcoming this trait is hard to do and accomplished in a myriad of ways. But, adult services providers often find that they are not performing for large crowds, but working with individuals. Just like a doctor or attorney would. When you provide intimacy for a client or customer, it’s a lot of one-on-on work. You focus on communicating with another person, and it all becomes easier. While it may still be difficult to come out of your shell in the beginning with a new client, it gets easier when you’re doing your job. It’s work-related, so nothing is personal. You aren’t required to open up, personally, to anyone.
- “I have a family.” Yeah—and, a lot of others have kids and/or are married, too. Your relationship status or parenthood level does not determine what kind of career you can have, in the adult entertainment industry or in other fields. While maintaining relationships when you are involved in this field may be tricky, it’s entirely possible. You just have to set priorities and boundaries and keep communications open and honest. Being married and being intimate with others may pose a problem—but, lots of other couples work through it. It will take both of you having an open mind. AND—if you have kids, you have to stay focused on their welfare and how you can continue to provide them with the best life possible. (This means being with them as much as you can, too!)
- “I live in an area that doesn’t have an adult industry.” Every geographic region in the world enjoys adult entertainment. Maybe you don’t live in a metropolitan city with adult clubs. Or, maybe you don’t have enough population to provide business for escorts. But, there is a guarantee that consumers of products from the adult industry live in your town. If you don’t think you live somewhere that you can make a living as a dancer, consider doing online work. Or, work for a phone sex company. There are still ways to make a living providing intimacy to adult industry customers. You may have to think out of the box, but creative options do exist.
Honestly, there were a million reasons that you may have told yourself that the adult industry wasn’t for you. But, the honest to goodness truth is that once you became involved in your career, you couldn’t think of a viable reason to go back to your “traditional” job. There are excuses for everything and all careers.
You can talk yourself out of doing anything. You may not want to go to a party or venture out to the store. You may not want to go to school. Or, you may fail to pursue your dreams and goals, due to the voices in your head negating everything positive you see for yourself. Don’t listen! Don’t pay any attention to that inner “voice of reason” who really doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Chase down those hopes and do something about them.
If you want to be an adult entertainment provider, don’t let anything stop you. Those excuses don’t mean anything.
But you already found all of that out. You pushed the envelope and have collected the prize. Good job!
Escort Agency Talk – Original article found on skipthegames.com