12 tips for escorts who want to provide safer rough sex
| For escorts, Safety
Some clients ask for steamy, romantic encounters full of affection, compliments and adoration. Others are not into the sappy stuff at all: they want hair-pulling, clothes-ripping, name-calling passion that makes them feel like you can’t keep your hands off of them. Rough sex is a request that escorts hear commonly. Yet because of its wilder elements, rough sex must only be performed with clients who are capable of following rules.
Escorts have to be cautious when offering this kind of an encounter in order to protect her own safety. Some clients might go too far and cross the line between acceptable passion and violent assault.
Rough sex can be a lot of fun; but, if it’s taken too far, it can result in injuries. However, there are some precautions an escort can take to make it a safer event for both her and her client.
In order to ensure that rough sex with a client is safe, an escort should consider the following 12 tips:
Make sure you trust your client. A rough sexual encounter should never be booked with a first-time client. New clients may not necessarily pose a risk, but it’s better to be sure that you have some knowledge of their preferences and personalities before agreeing to activities that might put you in a precarious position. If you’ve had pleasant and non-threatening encounters with a client previously, and you have no gut instincts holding you back, it’s probably fine to consider rough sex with him. Rough sex activities are only pleasurable between people who trust each other enough to relinquish control. If you feel you can’t trust a client with your welfare, avoid the booking.
Engage in some dirty talk. Rough sex is about passion that has to be rewarded immediately. It isn’t about being lovey-dovey. Many people engage in calling each other names. Your client may call you a “bitch” or “whore”, without meaning to offend you. It’s common to use profanity throughout the activity, such as saying, “Oh, f***, that feels good.” Sometimes, participants order the other partner to “Say my name!” An escort can tell her client how she wants him to take her “right now!” or suggest other things she wants him to do to her. Additionally, an escort can take control by telling a client what she intends to do to him, sexually. Slang terms for sex and crude intentions are popular elements of dirty talk.
Vocalize during the rough sex. Part of rough sex is losing control of yourself. It’s no fun to be quiet and polite during an extremely aggressive encounter. To let your client know you are enjoying his efforts, openly moan and groan, ooh and ahh and inhale and exhale loudly. You don’t even have to say real words when you use your voice during sex. But, you can utilize your vocal chords to demonstrate to your client that you’re excited and his thrusting or rough treatment is good for you. Studies indicate that men respond sexually to vocal triggers (not verbal cues) and experience elevated heart rates and increased pleasure.
Nip at your client. Nibbling or biting on each other (gently!) can be real turn-ons. Discuss this with your client ahead of time, and be clear that you do not expect to leave the encounter with bite marks. But, the sensual feeling of another’s passion-fueled nip on your neck can do a lot to excite the encounter even more. Tell your client you may lightly drag your teeth across his shoulder, if he’s okay with that. Biting your client lightly enough that he feels it, without causing real pain, will trigger the same pleasure response in his brain that sex does, giving him double the stimulation.
Pulling hair is often an exciting part of rough sex. Some men really love pulling hair, and it may stem back to their ideas about cave men dragging their women around by their hair. Consider wearing your hair in a ponytail during sex with your client. A ponytail (or braid) is easier for your client to grab on to while you are in a doggy-style position (or any others, for that matter). And, it hurts less for your hair to be pulled when it’s in a ponytail than when he grabs loose, random strands of your hair. Even though hair-pulling can be exciting for your client, be ready to tell him that it hurts, if he yanks too hard. If your client has hair on his head (and some do not), you should take advantage of running your fingers through it and grabbing it, if it’s long enough. Most men respond well to this feeling, too.
Consider alternative locations for your rough sex. One of the most exciting elements of rough sex is that it does not occur where you traditionally expect it to. So, don’t plan on being on the bed when you get it on with your client, at least in the beginning. Push your client up against the door or wall and begin rubbing up against him. Straddle him as he sits in a straight chair. Knock things off of his desk and let him penetrate you there as you lay down. Drag your client down onto the floor for a quick bout of passion. The idea is to take advantage of wherever you are at the very moment the urge overcomes you. Of course, as the sex progresses, feel free to move things to the bedroom, if you want. But, having sex somewhere other than the expected location adds some spicy taboo to the encounter. At the same time, though, be cautious to avoid public venues; keep things safely behind closed doors.
Always use lubrication. Because your client may become excited quickly, he may not want to wait for you to be fully aroused before he starts penetrative sex. To make sure that you don’t end up hurt (or sore) from the steamy encounter, apply lube immediately prior to the session starting. Deep and quick thrusting can dry you out quickly. Depending on how long your client can last, you may need to stop midway through to add more lube for both you and your client’s comfort. He will appreciate the lube, as it makes it easier for him to penetrate you more completely without resistance.
Hold your clients’ arms and hands down during activities. Pretend that you’re overpowering him as you’re on top and push your weight against his hands, as you pin them behind or beside him. It’s extremely arousing to be engaged in passionate activities, but be unable to move at the same time. If you trust your client, allow him to do the same to you, if he wishes. Some couples incorporate bondage into this aspect of rough sex by tying each other up with scarves, rope or handcuffs. If your client would like to be confined like this, feel free to indulge his wishes. However, you should have a significant amount of trust in your client for you to allow him to tie you up. (A dishonest client could leave you tied up and take all of your money or worse.)
Rip each others’ clothes off. Rough sex has an element that requires immediate fulfillment of sexual urges. Part of that is met by undressing a partner as quickly as possible. It can be fun to be so wrapped up in sexual desire that you rip your client’s shirt off or he tears yours off, too. However, if this is something that you will indulge in with your client, be sure to have extra clothes ready to go home in. And, make sure that he doesn’t rip one of your favorite or most expensive items. Ask your client ahead of time if he will be “found out” if you rip the buttons off of his shirt as you remove it. Think ahead of the ramifications before you begin tearing each others’ clothing off.
Encourage your client to engage in deep, fast thrusting. While gentle lovemaking has its place, it isn’t appropriate when you’re giving a client rough sex. Tell him you want it “harder” or “faster” as he is having sex with you. With your enticement, your partner will likely begin to increase his rhythm with longer, more forceful strokes. This effort is usually very satisfying for them and will cause quick climaxes. As your clients thrust, though, be sure to adjust your position if it is painful. If changing your angle doesn’t help, ask him to slow down or be a little gentler.
Avoid kinky sex. Rough sex doesn’t have to be kinky with lots of toys, weird positions, dom/sub characterizations or anything else that is typically related to kink. Leather, whips and masks don’t have to be a part of rough sex for it to be enjoyable. The kind of rough sex you should engage in with your client should be about desire and the immediate urge to fulfill that need. It’s about acting without thought and doing it now! Kinkiness is not required.
The safe word should be something that you wouldn’t normally say during sex, but it shouldn’t be so obscure that you forget what it is, either
Consent is the most important element. Rough sex should never be scary or against your will. Discuss the scenario with your client ahead of time to ensure that both of you are on the same page and understand any boundaries. Clearly discuss things you won’t do and actions you like. Set up a “safe word,” of sorts, to ensure that you and your client will understand when it’s time to stop due to discomfort or feeling threatened.
Rough sex can be very fulfilling and erotic. However, with a new client, it can be very risky. A client who can’t be trusted to respect boundaries should never be allowed to engage in a primitive-type encounter with you. Not only are you risking your safety with a vanilla-type encounter with a new client, but you could be subjecting yourself to a lot of pain and injury with a first-time client who wants to engage in rough sex.
Be cautious of a client who only wants to engage in rough sex. He may develop an addiction to the practice, which will debilitate him in future relationships. Encourage a well-rounded array of activities with regular clients.